I Dont Even Know What To Say.

Girl #1: I'd fuck harry potter
Girl #2: Yea.
Girl #1: Hell, I'd fuck Ron too!
Girl #2: Mhhmm.
Girl #1: Screw it, you can have them. I wanna do Hermione!

Bitch, Get Me A Butterbeer

(Midnight Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince showing.Tthe movie is running late, everyone in the theatre is getting restless.)
Girl in costume #1 (points her wand at random girl in costume a couple rows down) : EXPECTO PATRONUS!
Girl in costume #2 (retaliates): CRUCIO!
Girl #1: WINGARDIUM LEVIOSA!
Girl #2: IMPERIUS!
Girl #1: EXPELLIARMUS (girl #2 accidentally drops her wand)
Guy friend of girl #1, with satisfaction: You dropped your wand, BITCH!

Look Behind You!

Random crazy dude (whispering alone to himself): Watch out for dementors. *watch out watch out what out expecto patronum expectro patronum*

Fine. The Most Gender Confused Gets To Sit In The Middle

Annoying girl: The most beautifullest girl gets to sit in the middle! And that's me! hahaha
Sarcastic guy: Oh, you still think you're a girl? that's cute. Not.

Take Turns, People, Take Turns

Teen guy to two teen girls: Whoa, slow down guys, you can't both do me at the same time.

The Highlight Of My Life, To Be Sure

Scene girl (nostalgically): I wish I could be hazed. I mean, its a one time thing! You'll never get to feel like that again!

Didn't We All

Man sitting in a cafe :(conversationally) During my teen years I matured as both a man and a woman.

overheard by: saffrangrowild

The REAL Knowledge About Life

Girl explaining to friend: I don't know enough about real life but I know a lot about things that don't exist.

Pssh, Who Needs Pants?

Track coach: Nice socks.
Athlete: Thanks...
Track coach: Yeah, argyle is great. I love argyle! I have argyle socks that come up to here (points at halfway up his leg).
Athlete: Ha ha. Ha..
Track coach: I was wearing them at the commencement dinner! But you couldnt see them of course. Because i had pants on. (pause). I wear pants.

How About The Ozone Layer?

Short loud man: Heyyyaa, humma boy, how's the hummer?
Bigish, fatish quiet man: (something unintelligable)
Short loud man: Weeeelll, ya know, those things are huge! You can get abou' four foot wide wheels for 'em!
Bigish, fatish quiet man, accusingly: those kill the little animals.